The Way of True Beauty

August 30, 2015 by L1salindahl Filed Under: The Way of True Beauty Leave a Comment

Losing touch…

How is it that we get separated from our engagement with True Beauty? How does it happen and what replaces it?

One example might be as simple as our eating mode. These days we are so separated from our food sources that children think chickens come from plastic boxes or buckets and spinach from a cellophane bag. What a shocking experience for a city kid to cut a wad of spinach from a plant or pull a carrot out of the earth, with dirt hanging from its orange self – and call each fresh and healthy! A quick wash and ready to eat! What is dirt? What is dirt-y? What is all that cement and blacktop? What is it covering up? What is ugly? What is beautiful? What is potential? Who cares and why?

The role of Natural Beauty

The natural world is often a human being’s first introduction to and relationship with external beauty – beauty without. And in our current urban-centric, agri-business culture, most people are on a “nodding basis” only with our natural world. It is something driven by during the commute, a lawn to be mown, the subject of an ETV documentary about an exotic place, a tree in a park. While gardening is a giant industry, and ranked a top hobby of American households, still too many souls receive and participate in too little of nature’s beauty, let alone pay attention to and participate in the magic of its cycles.

Aside from the obvious simple Beauty that a garden creates, the relationships one forms while creating and tending it – with the soil, the plant, the animals, birds, bees and insects, the weather and cycles – are enriching and enhancing. And sometimes annoying and frustrating. Can I put that bit under “character development?”

Some small but powerful practices that help re-introduce us to the rhythms of Beauty might be: turning off the TV (or getting rid of it), ceasing to get your daily “news” from the fear-mongering mass media, or making dinner for a friend once a week or so. Sitting quietly each day (preferably outside) also ranks right up there. The 18 Practices of Beauty review all of these possibilities.

I believe we must help ourselves and others re-learn to consciously connect with the harmonies in our lives. With True Beauty. It is all around us, all the time. Look up. Feel out. Enjoy.

August 23, 2015 by L1salindahl Filed Under: Random Musings, The Way of True Beauty 4 Comments

One of the oldest chronicled disorders, Epilepsy has been steeped in stigma and myth. Those who have it are described as “afflicted” and often face very real forces and forms of discrimination and ridicule. I believe this is due in great part to three basic characteristics of Epilepsy:

The first characteristic is its episodic nature; it remains hidden, “invisible” to others for what can be long periods of time. When a seizure occurs, then, it can feel like a betrayal to both the person having it as well as anyone viewing it. This can erode confidence.

The second is its lack of uniformity: with seizures taking so many forms it is hard to categorize and simplify. To know “for sure” what it looks like, feels like or how it will “present” to use medical parlance. Even in one person’s life his or her seizure type can evolve and change over time. This undercuts predictability.

The third characteristic is its resistance to being known: there is no cure, in 80{b6bd3a4e53525eed6c1782795e6fce7c5ced74e7f1509be9a156ea8671249539} of cases there is no known cause (called ‘idiopathic’ epilepsy) and too often medication is only partially effective. Epilepsy refuses to be controlled; it is very mysterious. This can create fear.

Betrayal, unreliablity, unpredictable, mysterious…

These characteristics are, I believe, the primary contributors to epilepsy’s stigma. People distrust what they cannot understand. They don’t like to be fooled (“She was fine just a minute ago!”) or surprised (“It all happened so quickly”) or frightened (“That convulsion was the scariest thing I ever saw; my friend looked positively possessed!”). Further, doctors and parents don’t like to be defeated when they try, repeatedly, to help. As a culture we are uncomfortable with the mysterious. And no one likes to be afraid.

What has all this to do with Beauty or a possible practice of True Beauty in everyday living? Bear with me while I try to share the connection as it occurred for me.

After selling my entrepreneurial business to big biz of corporate America, I had a bit of time on my hands.

It transpired that I came to volunteer with the Epilepsy Foundation of America, serving on their National Board of Directors. Prior to this I’d lived quietly, privately with epilepsy all my life. It was a surprise, therefore, to discover that there was a whole community of people active, interested and educated about epilepsy. A patient advocacy group, even! They actually talked about it! And I had so much to learn about epilepsy, which felt odd; a condition that had so circumscribed my life, my being so out of the loop — not even knowing there was a loop!

It also came as a surprise that I had so much to contribute to this community. Back then the Foundation’s Board was made up mostly of medical practitioners, businessmen and some lawyers. It turned out that I was the first “consumer” — person with epilepsy — to be elected to the board.

I loved my work there. As a representative of the Foundation I traveled around the country as a public speaker, sort of Epilepsy’s “poster girl of success,” to educate others and raise money for various local Foundation affiliates. Unemployment and underemployment are major issues for people with epilepsy. My story of starting a business, working long hard hours, work-related travel, managing and inspiring employees both in-house and across the country — it was a story that flew in the face of the idea that it was difficult to employ a person with epilepsy or work around their issues.

This proved to be an important puzzle piece for me — my public participation in what had been a very private circumstance; public revelation of a private struggle.

Action, not abstraction. Being visible, not invisible. Vocal, not silent.

It was not easy, at first, to find and publicly tell my “real” truth. I came to be able to articulate what I had inherently known: while not pretty, or convenient, and sometimes brutal and deadly, epilepsy nonetheless transfers its own gifts. It can confer a kind of wisdom through its particular perspective. As an alternate way into knowingness, epilepsy can be pretty efficient. To acknowledge this was a significant milestone in my spiritual perspective and development. And I was saying out loud what many others with epilepsy inherently knew. In facing epilepsy we become strong. We are capable. We are not perfect, but who is? We are often sophisticated problem-solvers…we have to be.

In my universe, it revealed the connections as well as the distinctions between Truth and Appearances. And this distinction is a key component of True Beauty. It was through the topic of epilepsy that I was able to make the leap from inner truth to outer connection, between revelation and the dispelling of despair. Around the topic of this ancient and misunderstood disorder I was able to articulate — first for myself, then for others – the integral uselessness of “appearances” in the face of strong self-knowledge.

It may seem obvious, but to the person struggling with the stigma attached to a seizure disorder, it is not at all obvious. Nor does self-knowledge come easily; especially when the doctors don’t have many of the answers for the physical or emotional side of the equation. Do you know that certain types of epilepsy are believed to effect personality? Try that confusing discussion/possibility on for size when you are a hormone-ridden, answer-seeking teen-age girl.

I hope many get it: their assumptions about epilepsy, the appearance of epilepsy need not be its truth, their truth. The eventual truth/outcome. When delivering speeches I would see eyes light up; hope enter in; parents laugh. The dismantling of that assumption, that “automatic pilot” sort of thinking helped create the connection for others, I believe, between Truth, Appearance, and yes — Beauty.

It was humbling to realize that it was in part my story, my experience that held power for others. That to hear me — one of “them” – gave hope and inspired courage. Further, my marketing and communications expertise, garnered over the years in the business world, now allowed me to help the Foundation re-frame and re-tell the story of Epilepsy; undo some of the preconceived notions that have been handed down generation after generation.

Through the experience of having seizures I have been exposed to and learned so much. To name a few: altered states of consciousness that led to deeper understandings; the ephemeral nature of my own existence; confrontation of one’s own fears – real, imagined and a combination of two; the poignant beauty of existence; the hierarchy of importances – personal and otherwise.

The expression of my truth and being as a person with epilepsy helped to dispel stigma, brought new hope and created realizations for others. It brought light, a truth, into a dark and ignored corner. This was, to me, a form of the beautiful. How? It was contributing to harmony, where before there had been discord.

Then, this sharing my life story with others and having it be meaningful to them – what a gift! It got me thinking about how to “universalize” the lessons, about my conviction about Beauty, and how it was present elsewhere in everyday life. Had others thought about this? Written about it?

Circuitous though it may seem, it was my first inkling that Beauty could, indeed, be a practice, like meditation, or running, or…

The nine years at the Epilepsy Foundation gave me back so much more than I gave. Not to be hyperbolic, it transformed my “profane” success in the consumer-goods world into a tool for a more sacred work. I experienced a non-visual expression of Beauty on another sort of canvas. And it was powerful. It was a deeper understanding — and it has led me into what I am now calling The Way of Beauty.

Yahoooooooo!

August 9, 2015 by L1salindahl Filed Under: The Way of True Beauty Leave a Comment

Supporting Practices for The Way of Beauty

At the risk of sharing “platitudes as insights” as one journalist put it recently, there are three Beauty Practices that are old chestnuts, as my mother used to say. They have been in the culture for a very long time, and certainly have not been identified as “Beauty Practices,” though indeed they are, as they contribute to True Beauty unfailingly. These practices, human activities, whatever we choose to name them have endured through many civilizations and cultures because of their beneficial effect on the human body, mind and spirit — and consequently on our planet (not hyperbole). I have come to understand these as supporting and basic to the other practices of the Way of Beauty.

I bet you know them:

1) Practice “The Golden Rule”

Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. Really, such common sense.

2) Be still

Whether it is meditation, time in prayer or simply sitting quietly in a spot that resonates with you…find time each day to be still. It is amazing what comes in, or what is resolved, or repaired when serene time/space is made available.

3) Be active

Whole libraries could be filled with books written about the myriad ways in which an active body is beneficial to mind, body and spirit. No need to re-iterate here. I believe that the body is the temple of the soul, and so must be cared for and maintained as such. Not always a simple task as we age, BTW.

So these are the supportive and basic three. In “The Way of Beauty” book more is said about how they specifically support and align with True Beauty, creating greater harmony.

And a little reminder — to myself as well — these are practices. I shall point out, as we sometimes forget: there is no “end state” of any of these activities, though some yogis might argue with me. These are ways of being. And as none of us (except me & thee, perhaps) are perfect, they are rarely static or constant. I fall short a great deal, currently in the keeping my body active department. But I do practice at it. I do my best to practice the Golden Rule. Being still is far easier; noticing beauty does that for me. Practice, practice, practice.

Oh, and have fun doing so.

August 2, 2015 by L1salindahl Filed Under: Entrepreneurism & Women in Business, The Way of True Beauty 2 Comments

Practice the Pursuit of Happiness

The happiness that is genuinely satisfying is accompanied by the fullest exercise of our faculties and the fullest realization of the world in which we live.

~Bertrand Russell

Do you see the glass half full or half empty?

“Pursuit of Happiness” – it’s in America’s Declaration of Independence, and it is an integral part of practicing Beauty. Integrating Beauty is about broadening harmony, and creating harmony has a great deal to do with each individual’s ability to understand their own experience of happiness. And that is something that has become increasingly elusive in our modern society.

So, what’s the trick?

See the proverbial glass. See it half full and half empty. See the whole glass. Cultivating happiness, and the ability to have happiness is a choice, or more correctly, a continuum of choices. But at its root, being happy
is being able to see, to observe “the whole glass” and still choose to emphasize its fullness. So we have come, quite beautifully, full circle: back to the ability to see, our first practice — in order to have happiness, our last primary practice.

In their book How We Choose to Be Happy, Rick Foster and Greg Hicks did an impressive survey of how people achieve and maintain happiness. They were not looking for the “rose-colored glasses” kind of happiness, either. Their subjects felt all emotions deeply. In fact, it is from the Foster/Hicks survey that the proverbial Glass metaphor is resurrected.

One of the foremost results was the uncovering of this ability by those deemed to have maintained sustainable happiness to see the glass both half full and half empty. I.e., to see the balance in each situation, pros and cons, good and bad, and then to choose to concentrate on the positive aspects. This, according to the authors, created stable happiness. The survey revealed that consistently happy people were far from being in denial about the less than optimum, shall we say, aspects of their lives. The paradox being that in order to experience great happiness, we must also be able to experience life’s greatest sorrows.

Hence, do we conclude that the choice to pursue happiness is, perhaps, a strategy that can carry us through all that life has to dish up?

Seeing the glass, the whole glass, is a Beautiful ability. To be aware of the complexities, of the polarities necessary to create balance bequeaths a sense of harmony to the one observing and experiencing this wholeness. To see only a part is to experience only a fragment. Having only that experience, one tends to be reflecting only a fragment; to be, perhaps, one-side, or fragmented. Don’t we all know that person who persistently sees only the glass half-empty? For whom there is always an issue, problem, something not quite right enough? And then that other person, who refuses ever to see any problem, anywhere; who even as the house falls down around her/him peers through those rose-colored glasses and says “Oh, it will all be fine. Maybe I’ll think about it tomorrow.”

To see the glass, whatever it holds and how much/little of each, is to begin to allow for the “Both/And Universe.” It allows for all the layers of Truth. It gives space for our authentic self to be still, perhaps take a moment…and choose to see a good, a learning, some positivity in the situation without denying its darkness, from which we may create and/or begin again.

Choose happiness.

To Practice Pursuing (& increasing the catch of) Happiness:

Make sure you are being honest with yourself about yourself.
Take responsibility for your own circumstances: you are in charge of your situation. Attitude!
What feelings, specifically, do you associate with being happy?
Identify those things, people and/or events, both small and big that contribute to your feelings of contentedness.
Surround yourself with “higher companions,” those people who have your best interests at heart. Politely avoid those in “nay-sayer mode” (and we’ve all been there!).
If you fall into a dark place for a bit, recognize it, don’t bury it. Take it out for a walk. Own it and try not to spread it around inappropriately. Once you’ve had a good cry or rant, look further and see what’s next. Repeat as necessary.
Always remember: This too shall pass. So cherish the light and respect and endure the darkness.

Happiness is a particularly enhanced, perhaps human, state of harmony. It is an important Beauty practice. Do not think for a moment it is trivial or shallow. Some of the happiest people are the most productive.

His Holiness the Dalai Lama has had a great deal to say about happiness:

“The basic thing is that everyone wants happiness, no one wants suffering. And happiness mainly comes from our own attitude, rather than from external factors. If your own mental attitude is correct, even if you remain in a hostile atmosphere, you feel happy. …

When we feel love and kindness toward others, it not only makes others feel loved and cared for, but it helps us also to develop inner happiness and peace. …

Consider the following. We humans are social beings. We come into the world as the result of others’ actions. We survive here in dependence on others. Whether we like it or not, there is hardly a moment of our lives when we do not benefit from others’ activities. For this reason it is hardly surprising that most of our happiness arises in the context of our relationships with others. “

But what is happiness except the simple harmony between a man and the life he leads?

~Albert Camus

July 19, 2015 by L1salindahl Filed Under: Entrepreneurism & Women in Business, The Way of True Beauty Leave a Comment

So, mostly here I’ve been talking about how to actually practice True Beauty; how to incorporate it into everyday life. Remember why? To accentuate harmony, water down discordant aspects of life…create and add to the dynamics of the True Beauty that surrounds us. While I sometimes go off on tangents (which I hope are of interest), and will again next week, this week again I bring you another Beauty Practice:

Practice Taking Sanctuary

It is in deep solitude that I find the gentleness with which I can truly love my brothers. The more solitary I am the more affection I have for them…. Solitude and silence teach me to love my brothers for what they are, not for what they say.

~ Thomas Merton

Once the purview of the somehow nefarious, the religious or those seeking political asylum, the concept of having, taking sanctuary is one that is worthy of bringing into our daily consciousness and practice. I am speaking here of a physical place, not merely cognitive/meditative. One’s Sanctuary is a material manifestation of the Beauty state of mind. As without, so within.

Everyone needs their own safe haven from busy-ness. A place whose sole function is to nurture serenity. For this reason: Create and sustain your place of sanctuary.

A conscious practitioner of True Beauty must have a place to refresh, be nourished and even, sometimes, to be appreciated. Sanctuary is a place to be still; a place where harmony may be taken for granted, ultimately a place of serenity.

Sanctuary can, sometimes, be a chancy practice, or so History and Mythology would have us believe. Avalon was invaded; Eden was lost, and Atlantis sank. It seems virtually all the sanctuaries of old ended in cataclysm. Yet perhaps that is fitting. Perhaps it, too, is inevitable and even necessary (given the Practice of Honoring Entropy) the reality that all physical places are prone ultimately to dissolution. Transition is a necessary part of transformation. But the reward is worth the risk.

The point of creating Sanctuary is to have an intentionally nurturing retreat that is readily at hand. It may be your home, or a room in your home. Or a studio. It can be a garden, or even an area in a garden. It must be beautiful, pleasing to its occupant. Virginia Woolf articulated this concept among modern women with her declaration that one must have “a room of one’s own.” I am merely underscoring the sanctity aspect of that “room;” that it must have the quality of feeling safe, comfortable and beautiful. A place where the field of potentialities opens up to you. You.

Thomas Moore, in “Care of the Soul,” speaks to this need. He points out that the root of “eco” is from the Greek oikos, meaning “home,” and that ecology is really home science, not earth science. “Care for our actual houses, then, however humble, is also care of the soul. No matter how little money we have, we can be mindful of the importance of beauty in our homes. ” He goes on to include the earth as our home-place as well, of course; but that is not what we are focusing on here in this aspect of our “Sanctuary” practice.

Sanctuary is often, simply, our home — no matter whether we consciously practice and nurture this fact or not. And be aware that we can create degrees of sanctuary. Your home may be one degree, then a (private) room in it a higher degree. Ideally, there are members of our family that support our Sanctuary. When there is a safe place, full of supportive and known (not perfect!) people we consider family, we are truly blessed with a key Beauty component. But this takes work. And place, a sacred place – sanctuary – is a part of that work.

To create your sanctuary and practice seeking serenity within it:

Look around you. Is there a place in your life already that is serving as your Sanctuary and you didn’t fully realize it? If so, recognize this, and use it as such with greater mindfulness. Put up artwork or fresh flowers – intentionally add Beauty, comfort.
If you’re starting fresh: think about where you like to sit (or walk) and relax. Identify the quiet times and places available to you in your world. Think with your heart as well as your mind’s eye. Name it “Sanctuary”.
Go to your sanctuary (as sanctuary) regularly. Once a day? At least once a week. If it is home or within your home, this may make it easier. Go “into retreat” regularly – meaning, for instance, go home for lunch! Go sit outside. Take an opportunity to sit quietly between one project or task and another. Observe small things. Listen. Meditate if you like, but not necessary. This is your time, your place. Time for you, with you. It is in sanctuary that Beauty most readily seeps into us, from us.
Allow what “sanctuary” means to you to blossom and change with you over time. Sometimes it may include others; sometimes not.

The Practice of seeking and keeping a Sanctuary is important to the sustainability of the Way of Beauty. In order to sustain and nurture a cohesive Beauty awareness, in order to be a “cultural creative” and an agent for change in our turbulent times, it is very helpful to have a safe haven.

So: get moving, have fun, and use the K.I.S.S method in creating your sanctuary!

I love my family, my children..but inside myself is a place where I live all alone and that’s where you renew your springs that never dry up.

~ Pearl S. Buck

July 12, 2015 by L1salindahl Filed Under: Entrepreneurism & Women in Business, Random Musings, The Way of True Beauty Leave a Comment

As I’ve mentioned before, the notion of the importance of Beauty is not new. The Aestheticism movement of the late 1800s in Europe and America caused quite a stir. It posited that beauty was above concepts such as right and wrong. Aestheticism adherents eventually evolved their own brand of elitist hierarchy, however. I say “however” since a hierarchy to me implies a sense of righteousness, of superiority — an assumption of right-er vs. lesser, if you will.

Aestheticism was “art-centric.” Based in the philosopher Emmanuel Kant, following the French “l’art pour l’art,” under the Aestheticism banner the concept of beauty became too synonymous with art. True Beauty is not confined to or articulated by “art” alone. Further, in Aestheticism there is an assumption that nature’s own beauty (think composition, colors, material combinations) itself is in need of improvement through man’s orchestration. I find this arrogant at worst, and at its best simply a developmental phase in humankind. Or so I might like to think.

One of Aestheticism’s better known spokesmen was Oscar Wilde. Born in 1854, Wilde lectured often and

Oscar Wilde

vociferously on the importance of art and beauty in people’s everyday lives. He is quoted as saying “We spend our days looking for the secret of life. Well, the secret of life is art.” (Once again inferring that art and beauty are synonymous). He also said “Even a color-sense is more important in the development of the individual than a sense of right and wrong.” Hmmm.

This movement emerged in response, in part, to the ugly influences of utilitarianism and the then newly flourishing industrial revolution. But I see such a prominent paradox. While proclaiming that all should have beauty/art in their everyday lives, this crowd perceived themselves as superior to the group that would come to be classified as the “working class.” An artist, a creator of beauty was considered superior. Yet so many of those who had previously been the “crafters” or makers of furniture, paints, metal work, woodwork, fine art glass, etc. — many of them were now in the factories. But , oh!, were no longer considered to have enough “taste” to appreciate “The Arts” as conceived by Aestheticism’s aesthetes. While lauding art for art’s sake, Aestheticism’s adherents did not appear capable of recognizing the ubiquitous eternal nature of Beauty or the diversity of its makers and fans.

Hence, while eschewing the notions of right and wrong in favor of beauty and art on one hand, they were busily creating an elitist group and attitude that shut out entire populations based on their “everyday living” rather than on their sensibilities, talents, or (dare I say?) appreciation of art.

Aestheticism as a movement of the 19th century seems an good example of blinkered arrogance raising its nasty head in relation to the promulgation of the concept of beauty. It started with a noble intent, yet refused the broader and spiritual component that could provide the far-reaching healing for humankind. It had the idea correct — Beauty is transcendent — but the execution wrong. It’s not just about “art,” and certainly not about the sculpting and supposed improvement of the wild. It is not only about refuting the current cultural trends in morality. It is not just “l’artiste” who can sense or create beauty.

The sheer universality of Beauty’s truth appears to have been missed by Wilde and his cohorts. But they may have been on the right track. Now we must make some corrections and move forward.

There is a principle in organizational development circles, “Just because an idea (or product, or process) didn’t work earlier, doesn’t mean it won’t work now. Review and re-evaluate.” Beauty and its transcendent nature is an idea whose time has always been, and now hopefully we are mature enough as beings, able enough and conscious enough to review, re-evaluate and go forward anew — recognizing the inherent importance of True Beauty for all: human, planet, universe.

Out beyond ideas of wrong-doing and right-doing

There is a field

I’ll meet you there.

When the soul lies down in that grass

The world is too full to talk about.

~Rumi

June 28, 2015 by L1salindahl Filed Under: Entrepreneurism & Women in Business, The Way of True Beauty Leave a Comment

“Oh this is the joy of the rose:

That it blows,

And goes!” ~ Willa Cather

Rejoice, even in entropy…in darkness, in the entirety of the cyclical nature of birth, death and regeneration. It is easy to find Beauty in the part of the cycle that is about coming into existence, growth and discovery — less so on the other end: decay, dissolution and non-existence. But that does not mean the harmony and serenity of Beauty are not there.

When a truth rusts, a companion betrays or your sanctuary crumbles it is time to dig into your well of courage and recognize that the cycle is evolving. Call it Winter, transition, shadow or death — whatever resonates with you. It is a necessary part of the only constant: change; what I think of as the order>chaos>order cycle.

Our modern culture has tried to bury this inevitability in layers of illusion. In earlier centuries humans tried to tame change with things like “tradition” and “norms.” In our current techy times, change occurs so rapidly that our collective head spins, societal illusions fade and new ones form on our screens.

And, as chaos theory teaches, it is not chaos that falls from some mysteriously previous order, but order that spews forth from the primeval chaos. The Isness gloriously and unashamedly starts with a messy, unorganized clamor.

In our lives we cycle through various versions of this many times before the death of our physical bodies. Our spirit and personality grows and stretches, withers and shrinks at turns. We succeed, we fail. Sometimes we just coast. Martial arts teach us: to not be broken we must bend. There is cacophony that amazingly returns to harmony. Our bodies begin to decompose. Some believe this only happens to each individual human once, others believe it happens repeatedly.

Whether you believe in reincarnation or salvation, the real struggle is to do all of this messy part of living with grace, to honor the entropic nature of systems, and find the Wabi Sabi elements in the transitional tableau of degradation, impermanence, change, uncertainty and the eventual emergence of what will be.

If we honor the entropy that occurs in our lives rather than resist it, if we befriend it rather than demonize it we will take a long step away from fear towards serenity, toward harmony and the Way of Beauty, in the here and the now.

November’s sunflowers

To Practice Honoring Entropy:

1) Expect it. Since the cycle of birth-death-rebirth is inherent in all living systems, don’t pretend ti will not be an integral part of your experiences. Plan for it even!

2) Think compost, not mere garbage. If it is your life circumstances that are decaying and beginning to stink, look for ways the situation might be fodder for the future. If everything is collapsing, is it time to build anew — or plant trees?

3) Allow for “liminal space.” The transitory time between then & now, before & after. It is that healing time, for scarring over. For the field to lie fallow. Don’t try to repair/rebuild/reconnect right away. The result will be weak and/or ill-conceived.

4) During the sweeter parts of the cycle, practice honing your abilities to be responsive and flexible in the face of change. Notice those circumstance requiring dissolution of some sort (even if it is simply a gardening cycle or refreshing something in your home) and be mindful (oh, that word!) of how you respond and handle it. (For instance: I hate tearing out plants to make way for a new gardening season; it doesn’t matter if they are weakly blooming, way dead, or what — I resist that part of the process. Hmmm…)

There is no doubt that entropy is also a gateway to true Ugliness (which we have not yet discussed in this blog yet). But we cannot allow our thinking and perceptions to fall into “auto pilot” on the nature of decay, death and ugliness any more than we can about birth, life and beauty. Learning to truly appreciate the full cycle is part of The Way of Beauty.

Vermont’s famous expression of Wabi Sabi beauty

“The pain passes, but the beauty remains.” ~ Pierre Auguste Renoir

June 21, 2015 by L1salindahl Filed Under: Photos, The Way of True Beauty 1 Comment

Fishy Sky?

Beach Bird?

I love the cycle of summer..

Perfect peachy pie

… in the kitchen and the art studio

my palette, before clean-up

Fresh baked bread

Spectacular summer skies

the

light!

June 14, 2015 by L1salindahl Filed Under: Random Musings, The Way of True Beauty 2 Comments

Teachers are everywhere.

I’m not talking about the kind found in academic institutions here. Though upon reflection I’ll not rule them out, either. But teachers, really they are everywhere in our lives — whether we like to admit it (or recognize them) or not.

Just the other day there was a human interest sort of story in the news about these kids and their “mentors.” It was a feel-good story of how the adult mentors had made significant differences in the children’s lives. As I read I noticed a deep yearning inside me; it was laced with…

OMG! Jealousy!

This made me sit there and look at myself; I reviewed an old story I’ve been telling myself, and others, for years:

When asked who my mentors and teachers have been I have always shrugged my shoulders and said, “I’ve had none. No one,” thinking of course of the supportive, enthusiastic role-models in formative years who encourage one on. Who say “Good job!”, who bring you roses after your 6th grade play, or arrive on your doorstep with kleenex and chocolate when that first serious relationship ends. I could think of none in my past. No coach, teacher…

But actually there were plenty of role-models and teachers around in my formative years… In my case I was influenced greatly by what not to do. How not to act, or be, or behave. I endeavored to be the opposite of what was being modeled around me. Often, the loudest lessons available to me were cautionary tales. And as an adult, lo those many (these many) years later, I was not thinking that these qualified as the sort of mentors and teachers that I was being asked about.

I was wrong, I realized sitting there. Teachers are everywhere when one is willing to be a student, willing to observe and extract information, integrating it and transforming it into knowledge and, hopefully eventually wisdom. I had been being that student. And, too, in retrospect I must admit I was being overly dramatic. There had been those who gave me encouragement along the way — professors, siblings…

So, I now know/admit/recognize and declare (should anyone ask):

I have had the privilege of being “mentored” by harsh teachers who would rarely give me an inch. By the Great Teachers of Circumstance and Illness that helped me question, helped me discover my limits and the strength of my character. I have been blessed with sweet friendships of long-standing, where we support and learn from one another as the cycles of this life evolve. And I have the joy of being influenced and guided by the presence of natural beauty that is there for me always, every day. So grateful.

I am changing my story. I have changed my story — for myself and for others who may inquire. I have and have had powerful mentors. Thank you to all my teachers…and I look forward to those I have yet to encounter.

Beauty saved me. ~ Mary Oliver, from an interview on PBS

June 7, 2015 by L1salindahl Filed Under: Other Reading, The Way of True Beauty 2 Comments

ART037 So, here’s the thing: when I am in it, I don’t know if it is real, or if I am making it up. At least at first. But how long does “at first” last? How long does at first last? See, I just noticed that I typed that twice. I choose not to correct the mistake. I am so good at covering up my seizure-induced confusions from the public eye. Maybe I shouldn’t.

This a.m. I wake up feeling gloomy. beat myself up about it. I am lazy. don’t want to get out of bed. slug-a-bed. Why am I so depressed? How much is it my weak character, how much a come-with of having epilepsy? And isn’t that just a cop-out? Isn’t the essential “I” that is not this body strong enough to overcome this purely physical glitch? Or is it not simply physical? Is there a spiritual, other-dimension aspect to this particular affliction? I suspect the latter. It adds to my sense of hopelessness.

I manage to finally get up, notice the day. get dressed; start some laundry. Need to pee. Keep noticing that I need to pee. That is my first indicator — noticing that I keep forgetting that I need to pee. Living alone my body is my “other,” my witness. Ironic. It is at this point that I start to wonder if I am making things up. Am I being oversensitive? Imagining stuff that isn’t really there? Just having morning spaciness? Experience has taught me to try to override these doubting voices. But it is hard.

I am wandering in circles in the kitchen. I think I should get the hell off, away from that tile floor. My eyes tear up. I am hungry. Which pull is the greater? Fear or hunger? I convince myself that the fear is imaginary and start boiling water for chop-chop eggs. Put bread in toaster, justifying the illegal carbs by the seizure activity I just denied moments ago. Ah, the intricacies of cognitive dissonance! All the time I am waiting for/preparing the food, I am monitoring myself. I take another pill, then am concerned that it might be the wrong kind. I go to another bottle and take another pill. I announce to my empty house: “I am really sick”, and eye the tile floor again.

Now I am in my bed, belly full. Safe. Annoyed. Feeling foolish and interrupted. Apprehensive. Nonproductive. Will these “little seizures” escalate into a biggie? Dunno.

I hate this crap.

This is the stuff that doesn’t make it into the radio interviews.

*I know this is a politically incorrect term these days. I am not an “epileptic;” rather I am a whole person, one who also has a disorder (or is it now okay to say “disease”? I can’t keep up) epilepsy. But on mornings like the one described above, I don’t give a damn. And I am publishing it as I wrote it on that long-ago morning.